We’re well into the Christmas music season as many of us have been rockin’ around the Christmas tree since before Thanksgiving. (Thanks, radio stations!) Christmas music fatigue makes some of the worst songs unbearable. I’ve seen a few discussions on Facebook regarding worst and best songs, and I’ve put together my own list of holiday dreck as well as favorites. For brevity’s sake each list is limited to 10 titles. Let’s start with the good stuff:
Play It Again
Please Come Home for Christmas – Eagles. The Eagles released this Charles Brown cover in 1978 between their Hotel California and The Long Run albums. It has the patented Don Henley melancholic delivery.
Wintersong – Sarah McLachlan. This is such a poignant song — one of my favorites of any season.
Merry Christmas, Darling – Carpenters. Karen Carpenter. What more needs to be said?
O Holy Night – Mariah Carey. This is one of my favorite Christmas carols, and Carey does a quality pop song version. I like how she shows restraint at the beginning before letting it rip at the end.
Mele Kalikimaka – Bing Crosby and the Andrews Sisters. Christmas in the islands, circa 1950! The song found a new audience thanks to the swimming pool scene in National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation.
Christmas (Baby, Please Come Home) – U2. This is a fun 1987 cover of the old Darlene Love song.
Last Christmas – Wham! Is it cheesy? Yes, but once again I’m 13 and lovelorn. What happened to that junior high crush of mine?
Same Old Lang Syne – Dan Fogelberg. It’s a true story! A little trivia: The main piano riff is taken from Tchaikovsky’s 1812 Overture — sped up a bit.
Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas – Carpenters. Richard and Karen make a second appearance on my list with this song Judy Garland performed in 1944. The Carpenters covered it in 1978.
Winter Wonderland – Huey Lewis and the News. This was recorded at some point during the Sports Tour. It was an unreleased fan club gift in 1984. Of course it’s an a cappella arrangement!
Play It Again Honorable Mentions
All Alone on Christmas – Darlene Love and Mary’s Boy Child – Boney M. Yes, this technically makes 12 titles, but it’s my list and my rule to break! Both songs are fun and not heard all that often on the radio.
Now we move along to Christmas music that makes us wish it were January:
Never Again
Wonderful Christmastime – Paul McCartney. It would be wonderful to never hear this inane 1979 release again. By the way, while Wings members are in the video, this is actually a solo project. It’s all McCartney’s fault.
I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus – Jackson Five. The song was originally recorded by a 13-year-old in 1952. The Jackson Five covered it in 1970. The song tries to be cute but ends up being grating. I can’t switch stations fast enough when I hear it.
Do You Hear What I Hear? – Harry Simeone Chorale. This song was written by a husband and wife as a plea for peace during 1962’s Cuban Missile Crisis. It was released later that year and has been covered dozens of times. It has an interesting back story, but the song has never been a favorite of mine.
Santa Claus Is Coming to Town – Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band. This is another song I’ve never really liked, regardless of performer. Bruce yells his way through this version, and it gets tiring quickly. I’m good for one listen per season because it’s Springsteen, but that’s it.
The 12 Days of Christmas (unless it’s the Muppets!) This song was published in 1780 and would be more interesting today as a telephone game than a Christmas tune. The cumulative repetition drags on, but the Muppets — especially Miss Piggy — make it fun by giving the song the irreverence it deserves.
Blue Christmas – Elvis Presley. I’m just not a fan. The song sounds old and tired.
You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch – Thurl Ravenscroft. I like How the Grinch Stole Christmas! by Dr. Seuss. This song comes from the 1966 cartoon adaptation, but it’s annoying on its own. I can’t sit through the whole three minutes.
Baby, It’s Cold Outside – Dean Martin and Martina McBride. Dean, it’s late and she wants to go home. Let her. Talk about a relic that today screams, “INAPPROPRIATE!” The song was originally recorded in 1949 by Dinah Shore and Buddy Clark. The well-known modern version is the 2007 McBride overdub of Martin’s 1959 recording. The technology is so much better than the actual song!
Little Drummer Boy (unless it’s Bob Seger and the Silver Bullet Band!) Based on a traditional Czech carol, this was written by American composer Katherine Kennicott Davis in 1941. The Trapp Family Singers recorded it first in 1951. This is another song I find dull, but Seger’s heavily produced version is good for one play a season.
The Christmas Shoes – NewSong. This is a masterful piece of crass emotional manipulation with the gravitas of an Afterschool Special. Am I being too subtle?
Honorable Mention for Either Category
Merry Christmas From the Family – Robert Earl Keene. Some find this song of a dysfunctional Texas Christmas of questionable taste. Others find it hilarious. It likely depends on one’s life experience or intolerance for the Christmas jams that usually make playlists this time of year. Having worked in country radio, Keene’s tune makes me laugh out loud, as does his Cheshire Cat grin in the video. The song has since been covered by mainstream acts Montgomery Gentry and the Dixie Chicks.
Your turn! What did I miss, and what would you add? What do you never want to hear again? What would you like to hear more?